I went through most of my blog and I realise that most of my blog/life is work related. I guess that's how most adults spend their life. However, its certainly not about living life to its fullest. Its easy to lament that vacations and holidays are hard to come by but, if I try hard enough I can put together a couple of hours a day for my wife,kids, gym , dog and doing other routine stuff.
I shall certainly make the effort.
When I see several of my ICU patients and the state they are in, I do worry about myself. Rest, relaxation and hobbies are something that need to be enjoyed on a daily basis and not something that's been put of until after retirement....some of us may become seriously ill just at time and that throws a spanner in the works.
I recently met up with one of my old friends M, he is a legal moneylender now but has been through quite a bit. Days of working the club doors at nights, collecting money for loan sharks, going to jail for firearm offences and finally a fallout with his old cronies. You would think he would look old and haggard after all this. He doesn't, truth be told, I have aged more that him! And he has left me miles behind in the bench press department. His age, 44!
I believe its because of his priorities. If any job takes him away from his wife, kids and gym for extended periods of time, he leaves and goes back to a meagre existence of 'cukup-makan'.
I am sincerely trying to be the best at what I do. Many people are better than me in my job and I really try to improve and emulate them. The question is, why? And and what cost?
Friday, December 18, 2009
Thursday, December 3, 2009
time certainly flew very,very fast and before i knew it, it was time for exams. Those were very stressfull days indeed but I am glad I and my study partner. adeline made it. There wasn't much in the way of celebrations, just a good sleep and back to work. but the feeling of accomplishment was really good...
life goes on and now I am back to ICU again, working with my good friend of many years mafeitz.
guess its going to be fun
life goes on and now I am back to ICU again, working with my good friend of many years mafeitz.
guess its going to be fun
Sunday, August 30, 2009
In every bad there is some good
Exams are coming and like many typical students, I am beginning to put in the hours. Its in times like this I wish I had been more productive earlier. Oh well.....
Last Friday, to protest the relocation of temple to section 23, 50 foolish assholes with nothing better to do paraded with a cows' head and cried for blood at the Selangor state secretariat. If I had been hanging around there, I think my head will be dangling next to the cow's. Scary stuff. ( bear in mind that I am not the type that get's scared easily)
The internet, mainstream and side stream media was flooded with comments of people and politicians on both sides the camp.
The Hindus and non Muslim were understandably upset.
Its interesting to see what the Malays said.
Some Malay Muslims did not mind a temple, some did. Some said Barisan was to blame for this mess, some said PR was to blame. Some said there were ample amount of temples around. Others said to let them be, most of these temples were there when the British came....
But an overwhelming majority of these same people with all the different opinions, political background and walks of life uniformly felt that the demonstrations were stupid, uncalled for and not in the spirit of Ramadan.
I originally wrote a different post on Friday itself tittled 'What's wrong with my country?' There is a saying in Tamil that translates; in every bad thing there is a good thing. After reading all these comments from facebook and many web sites, I do know that we have grown as a nation and there is still plenty of unity among the people despite our differences.
Salam Merdeka and happy Ramadan guys.
Last Friday, to protest the relocation of temple to section 23, 50 foolish assholes with nothing better to do paraded with a cows' head and cried for blood at the Selangor state secretariat. If I had been hanging around there, I think my head will be dangling next to the cow's. Scary stuff. ( bear in mind that I am not the type that get's scared easily)
The internet, mainstream and side stream media was flooded with comments of people and politicians on both sides the camp.
The Hindus and non Muslim were understandably upset.
Its interesting to see what the Malays said.
Some Malay Muslims did not mind a temple, some did. Some said Barisan was to blame for this mess, some said PR was to blame. Some said there were ample amount of temples around. Others said to let them be, most of these temples were there when the British came....
But an overwhelming majority of these same people with all the different opinions, political background and walks of life uniformly felt that the demonstrations were stupid, uncalled for and not in the spirit of Ramadan.
I originally wrote a different post on Friday itself tittled 'What's wrong with my country?' There is a saying in Tamil that translates; in every bad thing there is a good thing. After reading all these comments from facebook and many web sites, I do know that we have grown as a nation and there is still plenty of unity among the people despite our differences.
Salam Merdeka and happy Ramadan guys.
Friday, July 17, 2009
A typical on call
Most of our life revolves around an 'on call'. Its a run -the-mill bread and butter of our lives. Life changing incidents take place during an on call, we are learning new things all the time and it conditions us for all kinds of emergencies and scenarios. Your innermost behaviour will surface during a busy on call; the hardworking solid guy n girl, the dumb ass, the talk-a-lot, the slow inefficient klutz, the uncaring bastard......they all come awake in us.
This was my typical call yesterday:
On arrival-big Nigerian guy with a gigantic slash wound on his back, lying on his stomach. There blood everywhere and he insist he just needs a couple of stitches and he will be on his way. Breath smells of alcohol, not the medical kind. Oh well, GA time! Slap in a a-line, turn him on his stomach and the surgeon gets to work. 4 pints of blood and two hours later, all is well.
Next case, stable patient coming from ICU for washout of his infected laparotomy wound. Simple washout and we are done. Its nearly noon.
SMO Hady and I converge in the team leaders desk to catch our breath and see whats next. In comes in a pregnant woman in labour who ruptured her uterus. Adeline shouts for help. Its a mad scramble to crash in on an operating theatre and we induce in less than 5 mins. Baby's out, surgeons do a good job and tragedy is averted.
Time to do a quick tracheostomy for a patient who is ventilator dependant. I help start the case, the ENT surgeons scrub in and its all left in my partners hands. She too has been having some difficult cases so far but still looks bright and cheer full.
We really need to get some rest but in comes a poor hungry child who has been fasted for some time. She has rhadomysarcoma and needs a CVL for chemo, bone marrow biopsies and lumbar punctures. Not a dying emergency but it needs to be done to expedite treatment, and the child can then break her pre-op fast.
Another couple of hours and the child can eat. I am hungry!
Hady kept himself busy doing a couple of nerve blocks of this nice gentleman who needs his leg to be amputated. He has such a sick heart, its barely beating. Hady and Wong did a good job, blocking the femoral and sciatic nerves. I throw my 50 cents worth by blocking the saphenous nerve!
While waiting for the block to work, we begin an ENT case on a patient with stridor, he had hypopharyngeal cancer and his trachea is stenosed. He can barely breath well and has a bad heart, needing bypass surgery at some point of time. An A-line, intravenous anaesthesia, jet ventilation and we are good to go. The surgeon dilates his trachea and we wake him up well.
I go to get food while Hady and Wong begin a laparotomy, a genltleman had a perforated duodenum after a difficult endoscopic procedure. 4 hours later and all is not well with him, operation done but I had been a bit liberal with fluid and now he's overloaded. Hady settles the problem with some Lasix and he pees buckets!
Next we start 100 kg lady who had ruptured an ovarion cycst. She looks ill and severely septic and my partner and I get get to work. Induction is smooth, the surgeons open up and there is about 200 mls of smelly pus in the abdomen. She is much better post op. And its also early in the morning.
I get a spinal anaesthesia going for a young forklift driver who wrecked his ankle. Nothing to it, pretty straight forward.
The neurosurgery team tells us to get a theatre ready, the have a little baby with head injury coming from Seremban and he needs an operation. I get my little drug book, check the doses, prepare the drugs, organise the theatre, machine, warmers and fluid, have a quick shower, a strong coffee and wait. And wait. And wait. Neuro surgery calls and says they will do him later.........
We just get in bed when the surgeon shouts for help. He's doing a gastroscope, the patient bleed half his total blood volume and needs resusitation. We get our half sleepy asses in the the theatre and begin work. An hour later, the surgeon found the bleeder and injected adrenaline. Patient stable for now. Anaesthetist are in good spirits, its morning and our call is over!
This was my typical call yesterday:
On arrival-big Nigerian guy with a gigantic slash wound on his back, lying on his stomach. There blood everywhere and he insist he just needs a couple of stitches and he will be on his way. Breath smells of alcohol, not the medical kind. Oh well, GA time! Slap in a a-line, turn him on his stomach and the surgeon gets to work. 4 pints of blood and two hours later, all is well.
Next case, stable patient coming from ICU for washout of his infected laparotomy wound. Simple washout and we are done. Its nearly noon.
SMO Hady and I converge in the team leaders desk to catch our breath and see whats next. In comes in a pregnant woman in labour who ruptured her uterus. Adeline shouts for help. Its a mad scramble to crash in on an operating theatre and we induce in less than 5 mins. Baby's out, surgeons do a good job and tragedy is averted.
Time to do a quick tracheostomy for a patient who is ventilator dependant. I help start the case, the ENT surgeons scrub in and its all left in my partners hands. She too has been having some difficult cases so far but still looks bright and cheer full.
We really need to get some rest but in comes a poor hungry child who has been fasted for some time. She has rhadomysarcoma and needs a CVL for chemo, bone marrow biopsies and lumbar punctures. Not a dying emergency but it needs to be done to expedite treatment, and the child can then break her pre-op fast.
Another couple of hours and the child can eat. I am hungry!
Hady kept himself busy doing a couple of nerve blocks of this nice gentleman who needs his leg to be amputated. He has such a sick heart, its barely beating. Hady and Wong did a good job, blocking the femoral and sciatic nerves. I throw my 50 cents worth by blocking the saphenous nerve!
While waiting for the block to work, we begin an ENT case on a patient with stridor, he had hypopharyngeal cancer and his trachea is stenosed. He can barely breath well and has a bad heart, needing bypass surgery at some point of time. An A-line, intravenous anaesthesia, jet ventilation and we are good to go. The surgeon dilates his trachea and we wake him up well.
I go to get food while Hady and Wong begin a laparotomy, a genltleman had a perforated duodenum after a difficult endoscopic procedure. 4 hours later and all is not well with him, operation done but I had been a bit liberal with fluid and now he's overloaded. Hady settles the problem with some Lasix and he pees buckets!
Next we start 100 kg lady who had ruptured an ovarion cycst. She looks ill and severely septic and my partner and I get get to work. Induction is smooth, the surgeons open up and there is about 200 mls of smelly pus in the abdomen. She is much better post op. And its also early in the morning.
I get a spinal anaesthesia going for a young forklift driver who wrecked his ankle. Nothing to it, pretty straight forward.
The neurosurgery team tells us to get a theatre ready, the have a little baby with head injury coming from Seremban and he needs an operation. I get my little drug book, check the doses, prepare the drugs, organise the theatre, machine, warmers and fluid, have a quick shower, a strong coffee and wait. And wait. And wait. Neuro surgery calls and says they will do him later.........
We just get in bed when the surgeon shouts for help. He's doing a gastroscope, the patient bleed half his total blood volume and needs resusitation. We get our half sleepy asses in the the theatre and begin work. An hour later, the surgeon found the bleeder and injected adrenaline. Patient stable for now. Anaesthetist are in good spirits, its morning and our call is over!
Saturday, June 20, 2009
the big one is nearing
exams are coming soon and its really spoiling my happiness. the workload is horrendous and tiring, and now things are a bit more complicated with family and all.
anyways, just sort of servicing the blog. will write more next time aroung
anyways, just sort of servicing the blog. will write more next time aroung
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Shukor Adnan
Our family driver who has been with us for sixteen good years died suddenly today. He arrived through an uncle's recommendation sixteen years ago for rural Kelantan and become proficient in his job.
He was loyal, hardworking and extremely dedicated to his job. He hardly seemed to tire despite my dad's hectic schedule and played a large role in our family. Work certainly wasn't easy but he stuck through it thick and thin.
He displayed the characteristic honesty and sincerity Malays are known for. He saw me through most of my secondary education, marriage and became friends with my two boys. He was with my family before my youngest brother was born and watched him grow.
His large family migrated to Kuala Lumpur and he did a good job as a family provider. He also recently became a grandfather.
He saw my dad through 4 general elections and was no doubt a big help to him.
As expected, there was sadness and tears all around.
May he rest in peace.
26-5-2009
He was loyal, hardworking and extremely dedicated to his job. He hardly seemed to tire despite my dad's hectic schedule and played a large role in our family. Work certainly wasn't easy but he stuck through it thick and thin.
He displayed the characteristic honesty and sincerity Malays are known for. He saw me through most of my secondary education, marriage and became friends with my two boys. He was with my family before my youngest brother was born and watched him grow.
His large family migrated to Kuala Lumpur and he did a good job as a family provider. He also recently became a grandfather.
He saw my dad through 4 general elections and was no doubt a big help to him.
As expected, there was sadness and tears all around.
May he rest in peace.
26-5-2009
Friday, May 8, 2009
Back again
The whole month passed in a blur, we we nearly as busy as I used to be i HKL. The department was chronically short wit many candidates going for exams, there was the pressure of doing a short charged rooster and tempers did fly more than once. 8 calls, plus occasionaly coming back on your off day saw the month through fast.
Hopefully this month is a bit easy.
I am also starting to feel exam stress and wondering if I can make it through the big one in november. Time will tell.
I do seem to be spending more time with my elder son shastri. He is growing bigger and stronger by the day and more and more defiant when he gets upset. From time to time, he does need a firm hand which only a dad can possess. I am also learning that as a dad, you need to earn respect and lead by example. The baby Arditya is starting to grow. He is much healthier now and really loves me. I just wish I had more time for him.
Hopefully this month is a bit easy.
I am also starting to feel exam stress and wondering if I can make it through the big one in november. Time will tell.
I do seem to be spending more time with my elder son shastri. He is growing bigger and stronger by the day and more and more defiant when he gets upset. From time to time, he does need a firm hand which only a dad can possess. I am also learning that as a dad, you need to earn respect and lead by example. The baby Arditya is starting to grow. He is much healthier now and really loves me. I just wish I had more time for him.
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